February 17, 2016

Acceptance

Sigh.

There goes the one thing that could bring my current misery away.

HR rang me up yesterday to tell me that she has contacted several locations but couldn't find me an opening, but will keep my file open in case anything pops up.

Despite the approval, it's still depressing to know that I have to continue my search, to know that I aced my grueling interview for no reason, to have to go through everything all over again.

I realised deep down, the reason I want so badly to get a good graduate job is because I want something to compensate for all the crap I went through during university. All the days spent force-feeding my brain knowledge I have no interest in, all the days of staying awake in extremely dull lectures, all the depressing times I've spent in my room studying for exams.

Maybe if I had enjoyed my studies a little more, then I wouldn't have such high expectations for a job. At least then I could work at a miserable job and look back on the great times I had.

This perpetual misery is taking a toll on me ...

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